People expect you to stay around while they put you last.

“May You Drown in What You Gave Me”

I hope you fall in love
with someone who mirrors you—
the same lies,
the same cold,
the same poison dressed in charm.

I hope she says all the right things
then leaves you gasping
in the silence you once gave me.

I hope she kisses you
with someone else’s name
on her tongue—
and you stay,
like I did,
thinking pain
is the price of being loved.

I hope she breaks you slowly,
so you feel every crack
you left in me.

And when you finally shatter—
alone,
unwanted,
ruined—
I hope you realize:

You didn’t lose me.
You lost the only heart
that stayed
after knowing
exactly what you were.
- H

"All excuses are false, Whoever wants you will fight for you."

“We Grew Up in Ruins”

Some of us
were forced to grow old
inside small, breaking bodies.
We didn’t get love songs
we got slammed doors,
broken vows,
mothers who stitched themselves together
in silence.

We learned love meant staying
even when it hurt,
fighting for what was already slipping away.

And then there’s you
fed love until you forgot
it was rare,
running at the first crack,
breaking hearts
that would have bled for you.

We,
the broken young,
know love demands staying power,
not easy exits.

You didn’t lose us
because we were not enough.
You lost us
because you never knew
how to stay.

And one day,
you’ll meet someone like you
and when they leave you
standing in the ruins,
you’ll finally understand
what you threw away.

- H

“I loved you so much I almost forgot to love myself.
Now I’m remembering. And you’re forgetting.”

“You Said You Don’t Chase”

You told me
you don’t chase anyone
you said,
“they come to me.”
You wore your pride
like a crown made of glass.

But you chased her.
You ran for her
tripped over your own lies for her.

You said you hated her,
that she was nothing but skin,
a body you could use
then spit out again.

You told me
she was ugly
outside,
inside,
everywhere it counted.

You said you could never love her.
Only want her.
Only ruin her.

And still
you chose her.
You threw me away
for what you swore
you didn’t even admire.

You ran,
for someone you claimed
was hollow.

And now,
you wear the emptiness
you once mocked.
You became everything
you promised you’d never be.

You didn’t lose me
because I wasn’t enough.
You lost me
because you loved losing more
than you loved staying.

-H

“The Last Call (You Chose Fear)”

I held the phone like it could rewind time,
and you
you cried.

You said you don’t feel safe anymore.
Not with me.
Not with her.
Not even with yourself.

You said you thought about coming back.
Just a thought.
A flicker.
A dying star, not strong enough to guide you home.

You said you missed me.
Missed my voice.
Missed the way I could love you without needing to destroy you.

And then
you told me she’s a good person.

Her.
The one who held your hand while you stabbed mine.
The one who makes you feel unsafe,
but still
you stayed.

You’re scared of karma, you said.
As if karma wasn’t already curling itself around your throat
every time you kissed someone
knowing you left real love to drown alone.

I asked,
desperately,
“Is it over for good?”

And you answered the only way cowards know how:
“I don’t know.”

You never knew.
Not when you begged me to stay.
Not when you ran to her arms.
Not when you broke your own heart trying to fill it with someone else’s touch.

You chose fear over love.
You chose noise over peace.
You chose loneliness dressed up as freedom.

And someday, when the weight of your choice is heavier than your pride,
you’ll remember:
I was the safest place you ever knew.
And you called it “danger.”
- H

Movies really need to stop normalize cheating!!

“a Girl Who Still Breathes”

They don’t know what it means
to rot while breathing.

I wake up inside a body
that doesn’t belong to me
paralyzed
crushed under weight no one else can see.
My chest a coffin.
My hands a grave.
My voice buried somewhere
beneath all the screams
I never got to scream.

Panic doesn’t announce itself.
It slithers in,
cold and quiet,
wrapping around my spine
until I forget how to be alive.
I freeze.
I vanish.
But I’m still here,
watching the world blur
from inside the cage of my skin.

The memories are murderers.
They don’t stab
they gnaw.
They whisper in corners,
dragging me back
to the scene
again
and
again
and
again
until I beg the walls to crack
and let me disappear.

I take the pills.
I speak the words.
I do what they say
might help.

But nothing silences the thoughts.
They are vultures
patient,
hungry,
circling.

Even my therapist
looks at me with fear now.
Like I’m a ticking thing,
counting down in silence.
She says she’ll leave
if I break.
As if my death
would be a betrayal
instead of a mercy.

I never asked to survive.
I never asked to be left behind
by someone who left a blade
where their promises should’ve been.
And yet here I am,
trying to stitch myself back
with trembling fingers
and a mouth full of ash.

They say what happened to me
wasn’t that bad.
But they don’t feel the hands
gripping my throat in the dark.
They don’t hear the silence
screaming my name.

This isn’t healing.
This is hell
disguised as survival.

And I don’t know
how many more nights
I can crawl through
before I stop
crawling at all.
- H

Unrequited.

I'm a bit too familiar

with this word.